I had the opportunity to attend a workshop this weekend for a class I have been doing online, called Make it Work Online (MIWO). The weekend was MIWO Live. My intention for the class from the time I signed up in March has been to find Clarity around my business. In fact, when asked what I wanted to get out of the class, I wrote down 1 word: CLARITY.
Fast forward to MIWO Live this weekend…. It’s funny how the universe is when you ask for clarity. Within several hours of the class beginning, the shift had begun. After making a suggestion in the class around something I had noticed for someone, I sat there and I started to feel this shaking in my body. I’ve experienced it before and I now know that it means that something is releasing or shifting inside my body. It used to really scare me and it still does a little bizarre, yet I know now to allow the feeling and not fight it. It’s a feeling that I am shaking inside my body and it starts within my heart chakra area. I always hold my hand up to make sure I’m not physically shaking because that would likely mean something else was going on. No, it just feels like my insides are shaking. I now know that it’s my energy systems rewiring. It’s pretty crazy when you think about it! I then raised my hand and shared what was going on for me. I’ve attended countless classes and seminars and I NEVER share what’s going on. Yet, I’m at a point now where I’m ready to be me and ready to share and ready to move forward. Jenny was amazing in her support and allowed me to just share what I was feeling and that I really didn’t know what it meant. I knew that it was something about how integrating my book, Expand Your Light, would work with my business that is technology.
So, I sat there for a while and when I had the opportunity, I took a walk outside. I needed fresh air and I needed to just be able to cry. I entered into a quiet place within and asked my Higher Self for assistance. I knew something needed to come to the surface to be released. When I asked, within moments, I was taken back to a memory around my mom. I realized that I had a desire for her approval around my spirituality and that desire for approval had kept me from allowing myself to say that I truly wanted to have my focus be on working with the lightworkers of the world. I was surprised at how this unconscious need for approval had been there. I had sent my intention to work with lightworkers in my technology business last fall, yet there was still a freedom that was missing in my fully stepping forward with it. My mother departed this earth recently (check out my alternate reality of grief) and I was very sad that she didn’t get to see my book. I know that this memory and release came to the surface in her passing so that I could fully step forward.
Sometimes we have unconscious beliefs that we don’t know are there. If you had asked me what was keeping me from fully moving forward in declaring my business and being super excited about the release of my book, I never would have thought there was still an unconscious belief about needing approval in my Being. We have to always be willing to look at what comes up, to allow it and then to release it.
Being present is the key to allowing the shift, the transformation. I could have easily just stuffed the feeling down and focused on the class. That is what I would have done years ago. Yet, after many years of practising being present, I know that the key is to pay attention to a feeling when it arises and allow it. If there is a message, then listen. If there isn’t a message, just allow the feeling and let it find it’s release. Sometimes there is learning, sometimes there is just an old feeling to be released.
Are you willing to feel?
Are you willing to release?
Are you willing for transformation?